But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
