I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
