we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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