we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize