You work out of a Hotel?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
