There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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