Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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