Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
