you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize