why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
