Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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