In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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