They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
