The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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