The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he told me I talked like a deaf person
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
