'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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