We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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