It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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