You made me cry and you don't even care
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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