he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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