I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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