he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
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