party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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