the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
