It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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