4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
