Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
