I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
