you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
