So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
