now i know why i became what i already was.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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