You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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