I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize