If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize