Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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