I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
