this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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