Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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