Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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