Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
