So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
