it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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