Cold hands, warm shart.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
