you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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