I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
