So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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