before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
