she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
