Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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