my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
